The Backstage Review
By Chrissie Hamlin

If you are into music, motorbikes and mud, this years Rock and Blues festival was THE place to be! As a first time rock and blues "virgin" the opportunity to see events from a privileged back stage point of view, as a guest of esteemed rock DJ Charlie Andrews was an offer I just could not refuse!
We arrived in Derbyshire in the driving rain on Thursday morning, and it was clear from our arrival on site that the weather and ground conditions were going to play a big part in the festival this year! Wellingtons were an absolute essential fashion statement for every age and gender, even the most hardened festival goers and bikers booted up and donned waterproofs to deal with the conditions, which were comparable only with a world war I battle field, but, despite the rain and the sludge, high spirits were certainly not dampened!
And a big mention must go to all the back stage staff and festival organisers who pulled out all the stops to cope with the situation admirably.
Spending 3 days backstage in the company of Mr Andrews and the Doctor (who have regularly compered the show since the proverbial dinosaurs roamed the earth) is an experience that I shall never forget! These guys are a class double act both on and off stage, and they are consummate professionals despite the copious amounts of alcohol they (and I) both consumed! Their dedication to ensuring that the show is highly entertaining, and their attention to detail is legendary! Their participation in comparing this event is vital to the success of it, and their relaxed camaraderie on stage sets the scene for an enjoyable 3 days of madness and frivolity.

Their stage costumes this year surpassed an already renowned ability to surprise and amuse both audience and performers! The wearing of the inflatable "fat bastard" suits to introduce the first act on stage, the amazing Scottish drum band Saor Patrol, was sheer genius! And the sight of the Doctor in his Roman Gladiator costume should have had a government health warning slapped on it for any woman aged 18 or over who happened to be in the near vicinity when the wind blew his "skirt" up!

The Award for craziest sight of the festival surely must go to the side-splittingly, hilarious vision of a tuxedoed Mr Andrews in full evening dress, being carried over the mud by a rugged, well built Outlaw, in a fire mans lift, so he didn't get his pants muddy! Sharing a dressing room with these guys is an experience - the Jagermeister, vodka and wit flows in equal measure, and although the sight of an inflatable Dalek and various things on sticks creates a fairly surreal atmosphere, you soon settle into the mood and look forward to rock and roll show like no other!

The bands this year were superb, and my particular favourites have to be the brilliant Rise to Addiction, whom I had seen previously at Camden's >Underworld Venue, and who really got the crowd going with an energetic >performance early on in the festival. Watch out for these guys, as they are sure to go on to big things! Other notable highlights included traditional Scottish band, Saor Patrol, Retro punk band The Dammed, and established old school rock legends and guitar heroes, Tygers of Pentang, Thunder, Blackfoot and Frank Marino amongst others.

The great thing about Rock and Blues is the diversity of all the musical acts on the bill, and to see all these guys relaxing and preparing back stage, as well as performing onstage was a big buzz for me. Watching Frank Marino playing an impromptu game of football with the Doctor's son, was amazing and hanging out with Saor Patrol, despite the fact that they are the ultimate Mental Scottish Bastards, and proudly wear T-shirts stating that fact, they are also great fun and very entertaining but I promise I wont tell anyone that in order to maintain their reputation! The Music drew to a close on Saturday with the awesome Aussie Pink Floyd and their fabulous light show. This band are so good, you can just shut your eyes and imagine you are hearing the real thing! From backstage, it was breath-taking experience watching the crowd on the hill, under a sea of umbrellas, chill out and experience a band whose sound system is so overwhelming it gets delivered in more than one artic lorry and sets off numerous car alarms around the venue simultaneously! This truly was finale to end all finales!

In the public area, the amount of stalls and diversity of traders means that just about everything anyone needs is available! A big mention must go to all the traders and general public who coped well with the difficult conditions and the mud!

Rock and blues is not just about music, of course. There are plenty of other interesting things to do and see in between the stage performances. The Custom Show is a must to see for anyone who has the slightest interest in bikes, and of course there are the legendary competitions in the beer tent - beer bellies, tattoos, bikini babes and wet-shirts abound here!

With some gentle arm-twisting from Charlie Andrews, I was encouraged to enter the bikini babes contest - and despite not winning, and bricking myself before hand, it was a fun experience! Getting your tits out before a large crowd of bikers in a beer tent is not for the shy retiring female types, but the opportunity to spank the doctor on stage was a bonus for me and probably for him too!

Of course, Charlie and the Doctor have such an awful, painful time being MC's at the bikini babes and wet T-shirt competition - it really is something they have to be forced to do with bribery, and any perceived enjoyment is pure, undiluted, acting on their behalf - or so they tell me!

So what was my overwhelming best memory of this years Rock and Blues?
I could say the music, or being back stage with Charlie and the Doctor, but if I were honest, I would have to say it was all the amazing, wonderful people I met and talked to during the course of the three days! I defy anyone to find me a festival that has such a great, fun, chilled out, family atmosphere, which is created by all those involved in the organisation and running of the event and all those who attend either as punters or performers!

I would like to personally thank Charlie Andrews for giving me the opportunity to experience all that rock and blues had to offer, and to also say a "big up" to all those wonderful people I met backstage and out front who helped me dispose of my proverbial rock and blues cherry in a positive cornucopia of mud, music, motorbikes and good natured mayhem! Thanks guys -
you rock!
Will I be back next year - you can bet on it! Long live rock and blues!

©Chrissy Hamlin 2005